In honor of my birthday and Mother’s Day, I am going to stray a little from my regular topic of “Think Globally, Act Locally” and focus on self-acceptance and taking time for you. If you think about it, we really do need to have our batteries charged and energized before tackling global warming, human trafficking and animal rights. You have to take care of yourself first before you can take on the world.

First, you have to love yourself. For years, I felt I never really belonged or fit in anywhere. I didn’t always fit in with my fashion-minded friends. Although, I do like to buy nice things and get dressed up, I couldn’t understand why someone would laugh at me when I questioned why I need to buy more than one purse. I wanted to talk about what was happening in the world and our environment not about shoes.

In college, when I saw the sign of SETA (Students for the Ethical Treatment of Animals), I was very excited. I was already a member of PETA. I thought these would be my peeps. However, I soon found I didn’t quite fit in with them either as they were a little too extreme. It probably didn’t help when I wore my leather jacket to their meetings, but in my defense, it was cold, the jacket was a gift, and it was the only warm jacket I owned. Not being a fashionista, I wouldn’t go out and buy another jacket when I had a perfectly good one. Besides, the cow would have died in vain had I not worn it.
When I joined a group at my church, even though they were amazing and accepting, I was in awe of how devout some of these moms were and felt like I didn’t live up to those standards. (Disclaimer: If you are reading this and fall into one of these friend categories, I love you all very much and you are all amazing. It’s nothing personal. These were my issues, not yours.)

It wasn’t until I read an article in Oprah’s magazine recently, where the author explained how she would force herself into situations instead of accepting who she was. And then it dawned on me. What I always saw as a curse and a feeling that I didn’t belong is actually a blessing. I have had individuals come up to me and say out of all the friends they have, we have the most in common, or you remind me most of myself. What I realized is that I may not belong to one particular niche, but I can belong to several because I can pretty much get along with anyone. So, just maybe, there’s a little of me in everyone and a little of everyone inside of me.

It took me 43 years to come to this conclusion and to fully accept myself. If you have already done so, I applaud you. If not, it’s never too late to start. As I celebrated my 43rd birthday recently and traveled with 15 friends to West Palm Beach, instead of thinking I didn’t belong, I felt like I could be the catalyst who clicked with everyone.

This leads me to my next point. Take time for yourself. Especially as Mother’s Day is right around the corner, it’s so important to recharge our batteries when we expend so much energy taking care of others. Case in point, the day after I got back from my amazing girl’s trip, I walked into the kitchen to see cereal and milk spilled all over the counter and floor. Meanwhile, my 13-year-old son consumed his bowl of Reese’s Puffs, seemingly oblivious to the food explosion that he no doubt created, but nevertheless blamed on the cat.

Normally, I would have lost my temper, but I calmly explained (more than once) that he needed to clean it up. How did I keep my cool? It was possible because I was in my happy place. I had a whole weekend to focus on no one else but myself. I know this is not feasible for all of you, but I do hope you will take this time of year (especially this Mother’s Day) to reflect on how amazing you are just the way you are and remember to take some time for yourself because it does make you a better wife, mom and person.

I’m o.k. with not being a fashionista or a hard-core vegan because I’m who God created me to be. So take time to celebrate you and take time for yourself. Because you deserve it!